Two grandmothers in first legal gay marriage in NY... →
In a cubic millimeter of brain tissue, there are as many connections as there...– David Eagleman (on the Colbert Report)
puremindlessvandalism: I love how half the news stations stopped covering the Oslo explosion once they found out a white guy was behind it.
Text messages, 11:32pm
Max: What dance was popular in 1776? Indepen-dance!
David: What kind of cards did colonials play with? DECKlarations.
Max: Did you hear the one about the Liberty Bell?
David: Yeah, that one always cracks me up.
Max: What did King George think of the American colonists? He thought they were REVOLTING.
David: How do Bostonians treat their silversmiths? They REVERE them!
Max: How did dogs protest in 1773? The Boston FLEA party!
David: How did Carlos Mencia set off the revolution? His intolerable act!
Max: What would you call a parade of German mercenaries?
David: A Hessian procession!
Max: What was George Washington's favorite kind of tree? An INFANtree.
David: What's an artilleryman's favorite dessert? S'Mortars!
Max: Which one of Washington's officers had the best sense of humor? LAUGHayette.
David: Why couldn't Betsy Ross run a marathon? Her strength was flagging.
Max: Which colonists would appreciate these jokes the most? PUNsylvanians.
David: Where did the authors of the Federalist Papers go for drinks? To the PUBlius.
Max: Where did George Washington buy his axe? At the CHOPPING mall.
David: What was Jefferson's favorite instrument? The MontiCELLO!
Max: What does a patriot put on his dry skin? Revo-LOTION.